I hope you are all keeping well and safe! I am back with a slightly different post today but one I am so excited to share with you.
If you have been around for a while you will know back in February I guest posted for the lovely Bee. I wrote a post about my experiences of unrequited love and in some ways why I think it is one of my favourite kinds of love due to the personal growth you get from it. However when I wrote this post I wrote it knowing that if it was on her blog it would feel less like I was exposing a side of me to my followers. (My head works in weird ways but in my head it was less scary to post on her blog.) However, the last couple months for me have been massive in terms of self growth and progress and I felt it was only right for me to share it with those who may have not seen it. It is okay to be vulnerable it makes us human.
When we discussed our guest posts I was not really sure what I wanted to write about within my guest post but we discussed the idea of it being Valentine’s day themed. And you see the thing is Valentines for me has never really been a day I have chosen to celebrate. (mainly because being single on Valentines made it hard to celebrate.) So I was not sure what I wanted to talk about in this post.
Obviously now that I am sharing it with you guys it is not February anymore but I think the points still stand I also thought it was so important to share with you guys as I want to be able to share with you some more personal things and also I think it is important to normalise the impact that unrequited love an have on someone. Below I have included the original guest post with a few added extras. I have also included a link to Bee’s blog throughout this because let’s be real she deserves all the love in the world.
But after spending some time thinking about the different things that come to mind when thinking about love I thought I would talk about my favourite kind of love.
I think that it important to note that many will find it insane for this to be my favourite kind of love! However I hope that once I will explain to you why it is my favourite. You see it is my favourite kind of love because it is there to teach you something. Now do not get me wrong I definitely did not have this opinion all the time and I was with you that unrequited love sucked so bad. However I now although you may not see it at the time, it is there for a lesson.
As someone who whether they like to admit it or not is a bit of a hopeless romantic, who loves to read romance novels and watch the cheesy romance films it was kinda inevitable that for me, It makes the most fascinating part of any love story because you want to know the outcome.
Most importantly it is my favourite kind of love because of my experiences with it. I say my experiences but it is also important to note that sometimes this love doesn’t start out as what it is but is sometimes formed by mistakes made by ourselves or the interest of our hearts but as previously stated it is there for a lesson. Now in the aim of being 100% honest with you guys this does not end like one of those romance novels/films, it just wasn’t meant to be. However, it is something I often find myself thinking about because looking back on it, in some forms it is very responsible for my self-growth journey.
I am of course talking about the extraordinary and remarkable excruciating pain that comes with Unrequited love. Unrequited love is something I am positive we all go through at some point in our lives but it is something I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy, despite it holding a special place in my heart as a cherished kind of love.
I thought it was important to include a definition of unrequited love:
“Unrequited love or one-sided love is love that is not openly reciprocated or understood as such by the beloved. The beloved may not be aware of the admirer’s deep and strong romantic affection, or may consciously reject it.”
Because you see no matter how you look at it Unrequited love is in inevitable. In one form or another it is something we have all been through.
My example of Unrequited Love:
Have you ever loved someone so deeply that you would do anything for them? If answered yes, you will understand this story.
You see the way I saw it I could not sit here and tell you all about my love for unrequited love without giving you my example of it.
However for the sake of keeping things as anonymous as possible the names have been changed. To a certain degree the changing of names made this easier to tell as it is a chapter of my life the universe closed a long time ago. Whether you believe in the universes control over things or not, the way I saw it the universe said hey no we are not doing this anymore.
My story of unrequited love nonetheless takes a very strange turn. I believe that this unrequited love took place at some point on both sides of this story. I am more than certain at one point had we both been completely honest with each other this story would have had a very different ending. It after all was just not meant to be.
The love you have for your friends is one you should never take for granted but sometimes friends (The Best of Friends) make you stop and think. About whether the friendship is more than just a friendship. Sometimes for selfish reasons we chose to ignore these feelings and hold dear to the friendship you have created. You know the kind of friendships where everyone around you just seems to think that one day it would be you two as the couple. The two people just assumed that you would end up together. This was that.
To me however the worse thing is that sometimes it takes losing this friendship to make you realise how much you loved them. Despite this the time you have the courage to say anything it is too late. This is basically what happened in my story of unrequited love. It started with him being incredibly vocal about his feelings and me due to the feelings of other people choosing to ignore it and sta friends, and then a really strange thing happened I realised quite how much they meant to me but we had drifted apart and it just never happened because they were seeing other people. When we finally reunited for a couple of months they were not the same, it just wasn’t the same as it used to be.
Now they have a family and I am so happy for them. In fact, I do not think I could imagine it any other way. In a selfish sense it meant I had to let go. I had to decide to let go of the in my heart because it had been so long since we had this weird connection that I was holding on to a dream of it coming back round in a circle. They have a family and it was the push I needed to let go of the past. Now do not get me wrong I will forever and always love them but sometimes the biggest reward is seeing them happy.
This story I think is a great example of how unrequited love sometimes kicks you in the teeth but still teaches you what you want in life.
The thing is I am truly grateful for this experience because no matter how much I miss you, I know that it was a lesson that I had to learn and it is one I will hold on to forever. Sometimes it is okay to act like the fool and jump head first in to the magical mystery of love and friendship and I know the next time I feel like that I will have the courage to jump blindly into whatever the universe has sent my way. And for that I am eternally grateful.
The benefits of Unrequited love:
- It makes for a great opening story line
- You learn to love whole heartedly
- It is one of life’s best lessons
- You learn what it is you truly want and deserve
- It tells you that you can love again
- Teaches you to take risks
I thought the best way to end this little post would be a line from one of my favourite movies. I know it is no longer Christmas, although it is closer than it was when I first published this post but it is only right to end with a quote from Love Actually. Because you see I like David (HUGH GRANT) in this movie do believe that if you take a moment to truly look around you will see that “Love is actually all around.” Requited or not.
I also wanted to just give a massive thank you to Brittany from Mind. Beauty. Simplicity for letting me be a guest post on her blog, I am truly a massive fan of her and her blog and will be forever grateful for this opportunity. And a massive thank you for letting me repost this today.
I would love to hear all about your experiences with Unrequited Love. Tell me all about it in the comments below.